no words for strangers

...especially those who lack class. Yesterday I was standing third in line for the ladies room at a bar and the two "women" in front of me weren't holding their liquor very well lets just say. The second lady kept half squatting - doing the potty dance, or what have you and shouting loudly to the woman in the bathroom, then went up and starting pulling hard on the locked bathroom door, shaking it in its frame. I was astonished and embarrassed to even bare witness to this.

She then looked at me and said something I couldn't decipher and laughed. I just stood still and fluttered my eyelids saying ".....hmmmm...do you know that woman in there?" To which she flung her hand out at me as if to swat something in the air between our faces and said "heavens no....mummmmble mummm" to which I again said "hmmmmm" and smiled courteously at her and turned my head away to shield a smile from bursting into a laugh. Then she started discussing the possibility that the bathroom wouldn't have a pleasing scent judging from the length of time it had been occupied thus far...only her wording was not very lady-like I can assure you.

You MUST be kidding me I thought to myself. Then I started scanning my eyes over the other inhabitants of the bar and my throat dropped to my stomach in despair. "A whole other breed" I thought sadly to myself. Then suddenly the lady is reaching out and touching my hair and I squint my eyes and smile at her. "OH I WISH I HAD SUCH CUTE HAIR" she shouted in my face. "Well, we always want what we can't have so we better make the best of what we do have right?" I said. She just looked at me.

Then I quickly turned my head to see who just nudged me rudely and sloppily from behind and there stood this "voluptuous" woman who had made herself quite noticeable earlier on the dance floor by her "sexy/neauseating" movements. She stood looking up at me and said some senseless BS to which I could come up with nothing to say. Then she said "once you break the seal! There's not stopping it". I started gagging immediately and looked the other way and thank GOD it was finally my turn to use the ladies room!!!!