bittersweet

I said my first goodbye yesterday. It was to an Art Director I've worked with on photo shoots for the past half a year or so...when we stood at the corner of the parking lot and I realized I wouldn't be working with her again before I left she reached out and gave me another big hug even though we'd only just hugged goodbye moments before.


I turned around and walked away on the cold grey cement slabs until I dashed out and ran across the six lanes of oncoming traffic to the other side of the street. The fog was drifting in circles above my head, the cold wind pushing it around the tops of skyscrapers...devouring them. To think...it was about 20 degrees cooler only hours before.

My mind keeps saying "bittersweet...bittersweet" when people tell me how much they'll miss me. I smile back and calmly tell them in a higher pitch that I too will be missing them, and my cheeks flame up to pink when I imagine the wooden house waiting under a thin blanket of snow back east for us. I become lost in my thoughts and detatched from the group as my heart starts to ache for my new quiet life. Bittersweet is my love.