and mine eyes dampen with tears
at any and every given moment.
I wish to take all of my belongings
and make a huge pile in the yard beneath moonlight
then light it all afire.
reality wanes before me
nothing concrete to grasp
pretty soon I'll be pushed to do that which I do best...
----------------------
I had to hide this post down here. The ex who broke my heart and taught me to open my eyes sent me this pic of himself this day. I cropped out his face to give him anonymity. It makes me laugh, makes me realize how stupid and blind I was. Who sends a picture of themselves in a bathing suit to their ex...is it a poor attempt to make me miss him or what I gave up? Then again he wanted me to send him pictures of myself in much less. Such a shallow man. I don't know what it is but I start laughing every time I look at this.
And that stupid tattoo. He went and got that less than a few days after I told him tattoo's were sexy as hell. He came over in the winter in a white tank top and sat at the edge of my bed posing and flexing his triceps nonchalantly until I noticed. "What the hell is that!?" I think I finally said and walked over to inspect it and then started laughing. That pissed him off and we had a huge fight. It was by far the cheapest crappiest tat I had ever seen, the arm band didn't even line up to itself beneath his arm. He said he looked in the yellow pages and picked a shop and went in and had it done. I'm convinced he was probably such a pompous dick to the tatter that the crap-job was done on purpose. Anyway...it's funny what memories looking at a picture of a familiar object can bring back to you. I know that's harsh to call him an object...but I make no apologies for it, he objectifies himself...!
[11.09.06]
2 comments:
The song, in which i do not remember the name plays through my head over and over and over these past three days.. "Give me the words"
I'm hearing it now...In a Manner of Speaking ;)
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